Reason

I want to see you
I need to look into your eyes
and know that this is not only
some drunken skype thing
some sweet madness
I need to see your eyes
without wine
or skype
because I want to trust you.
Choose you, like you already chose me
like some corner of your heart
puzzled us both mightily by choosing me
and didn’t we do well?
to honour it
even if we needed wine
to listen to that voice
that most sane delusion
whispering “trust him. trust her”
both crazy enough to listen
even if only at night.
Didn’t we do well? That
voice is life, that madness
is love, that doesn’t need
a reason.
And now my 3am voice is saying
you might be the one
to know.
I don’t know why I care if anyone ever
knows. If I care. But
you might join me here
in this loneliness and this indifference
not to fill it. Just to see it. So
I want to lay it all out for you
because you might take the opportunity
to not hurt me. If you
turn around, walk away, and live;
I will know that somebody saw
and somebody knew. Without needing a reason.

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